Why Not?

I recently had a conversation with a friend who was being confronted with a decision to sleep with a girl or not. He said he couldn’t hold it in any longer (in reference to celibacy), and he figured…”hey, why not?” Why not sleep with this girl solely for the sexual enjoyment? After all, it was easier to give in than to show restraint. My mind was racing after this conversation with my friend.

And here is why: For many years I gave in. I did not care. I did not care about other people, their feelings, or the need to show personal respect. I did not care about my body, my “feelings” (because I had none, right?), and I did not respect myself. I truly believed that life without boundaries for myself was more fulfilling, more fun. Eventually I grew a conscience. I grew a heart and an awareness of the importance of having healthy boundaries for myself and for other people. Heard of the book? Boundaries, by Henry Cloud and John Townsend. I read it, and something changed. I began to respect others and value them equal to myself.

Whether or not you, Reader, are a religious person, keeping firm boundaries is a healthy idea/task. For me, having a boundary keeps people from walking all over me, manipulating me, and abusing me. The more I flex my “boundaries” muscles the happier I am with myself. Instead of saying yes to everything that makes me feel good, I first decide what my driving motivation is in the situation for what I am pursuing.

So, why not? For me, the reason is I respect myself. And I respect you also. I wish I had held these boundaries in the past. And I wish others had shown me the same respect. That is why not. Am I perfect at this? Um, NO. But it’s progress not perfection, right?

 

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Excerpt from Walden by Henry David Thoreau

Nature is as well adapted to our weakness as to our strength. The incessant anxiety and strain of some is a well-nigh incurable form of disease. We are made to exaggerate the importance of what work we do; and yet how much is not done by us! or, what if we had been taken sick? How viligant we are! determined not to live by faith if we can avoid it; all the day long on the alert, at night we unwillingly say our prayers and commit ourselves to uncertainties. So thoroughly and sincerely are we compelled to live, reverencing our life, and denying the possibility of change. This is the only way, we say; but there are as  many ways as there can be drawn radii from one centre. All change is a miracle to contemplate; but it is a miracle which is taking place every instant. Confucius said, “To know that we know what we know, and that we do not know what we do not know, that is true knowledge.” When one man has reduced a fact of the imagination to be a fact of his understanding, I forsee that all men will at length establish their lives on that basis.

Walden – Henry David Thoreau
From the chapter titled “Economy”

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I carry your heart with me…I carry it in my heart

E.E. Cummings – I Carry Your Heart With Me

I carry your heart with me (I carry it in my heart)
I am never without it (anywhere
I go you go, my dear; and whatever is done
by only me is your doing, my darling)
I fear no fate (for you are my fate, my sweet )
I want no world (for beautiful you are my world, my true)
and it’s you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows
higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that’s keeping the stars apart

I carry your heart (I carry it in my heart)

 

 

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You were only waiting for this moment to arise

Blackbird singing in the dead of night
Take these broken wings and learn to fly
All your life
You were only waiting for this moment to arise
Blackbird singing in the dead of night
Take these sunken eyes and learn to see
All your life
You were only waiting for this moment to be free
Blackbird fly, blackbird fly
Into the light of the dark black night
Blackbird fly, blackbird fly
Into the light of the dark black night
Blackbird singing in the dead of night
Take these broken wings and learn to fly
All your life
You were only waiting for this moment to arise
You were only waiting for this moment to arise
You were only waiting for this moment to arise

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And she’s all alone…

Spinning, laughing, dancing to
her favorite song
A little girl with nothing wrong
Is all alone

Eyes wide open
Always hoping for the sun
And she’ll sing her song to anyone
that comes along

Fragile as a leaf in autumn
Just fallin’ to the ground
Without a sound

Crooked little smile on her face
Tells a tale of grace
That’s all her own

Spinning, laughing, dancing to her favorite song
A little girl with nothing wrong
And she’s all alone

Seven Years – Norah Jones

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Divine Romance

The fullness of Your grace is here with me
The richness of Your beauty is all I see
The brightness of Your glory has arrived
In Your presence God, I’m completely satisfied

For You I sing I dance
Rejoice in this divine romance
Lift my heart and my hands
To show my love, to show my love

A deep deep flood, an Ocean flows from You
Of deep deep love, yeah it is filling up the room
Your innocent blood, has washed my guilty life
In Your presence God, Im completely satisfied

For You I sing I dance
Rejoice in this divine romance
Lift my heart and my hands
To show my love, to show my love

All For You, I sing I dance
I Rejoice in this divine romance
Lift my heart and my hands
To show my love

-Divine Romance, Phil Wickham

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Mystery

Here in the Quiet speak to me now
My ears are open to
Your gentle sweet whispering
Break down the door, come inside
Shine down Your bright light
I need a lamp for my feet, I need a lamp for my feet

I want to hear the thunder of who You are
To be captured inside the wonder of who You are
I want to live I want to breathe
To search out Your heart and all of Your mysteries

You were the first and You’ll be the end
Time cannot hold You down
Why save a wretch like me?
No eye has seen, no ear has heard
No heart could fully know
All of Your mystery

Your glory burns in the stars
Shine down your light let it burn in my heart
Bring me to glory, bring me to you
Lord it’s your heart that I will hold onto

Your glory burns in the stars
Shine down Your light let me know who You are
Jesus, Your glory burns in the stars
Shine down your light, let me see you, let me see you

I want to hear the thunder of who You are
To be captured inside the wonder of who You are
I want to live I want to breathe
To search out Your heart and all of Your mysteries…

-Mystery, Phil Wickham
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